Posted on: Friday, August 9, 2013
I was in search of some specific photos for a later post and ended up recovering a lot of images from my childhood. Remember how fucking awesome it was to be a kid? Don't get me wrong, I love the [implied] freedom of being an adult and all, but as a kid we could just be total jerks and roll around in the grass and no one really gave a damn? Because hey, kids will be kids. Ruin a family photo? Well, then, yeah, you are a total jerk. Because film wasn't the cheapest thing. So what we shot was what we got. Take a peek.
For starters, that up top is me (with wet hair, god forbid you ever went outside with wet hair. You'll catch your death! they would exclaim), my kitten Slider — named after the Cleveland Indian mascot, and my brother rocking a Dick Tracey shirt. So Ohio it hurts.
Yeah, that little nugget in the middle is me. Forever the shortest, but not mad about it. See, when I was in elementary school and junior high, I got pulled out of classes to attended these gifted programs and summer camps. Odyssey of the Mind was a Lateral-Thinking Competition for kids like me. Oh and I'm wearing clay cat earrings. Nerd alert.
Rewind. Look at this glamorous bish. Yeah, my mom put me in pageants until I was old enough to tell her I didn't want to be in pageants anymore. I used to have crippling stage fright, so it didn't take me long. Had I stuck it out, maybe I would have been the first Honey Boo Boo.
Studies show that between the ages of four and ten, 90% of my wardrobe included a Disney Character of some sort. You should see my first day of Kingergarden outfit — I even had Beauty and the Beast light-up sneakers.
Like I said, when everyone was still using film, you were a dick if you ruined an otherwise 'serious' photo. This is what you get for making me and my brother wear water shoes, Mom.
Here you can see me defying all laws of physics by crying whilst on a swing. My brother looks on.
Random fact about me: when I was little, my head was 45% eyeball and I could also see through walls.
And the kicker. Somewhere along the way, I convinced my mother to take my friend and me to see *NSYNC. Matching shirts, denim backdrop, Tony the Tiger, and a stretchy choker on a Polaroid. It's... so... 90s.